Strong Women of the Bible: Abigail (6/6) - H

Hello beautiful people and welcome to my series, Strong Women of the Bible! In reading through the Bible, have you ever thought, "Okay, but where are the women??" Well, my friends, over the last few weeks I have been bringing to your attention six underappreciated women of the Old Testament! This final week's focus is Abigail.Weeks of research and many resources have gone into this series, with remarkable results. I can't wait to share them with you! So let's begin, shall we? 😁

Abigail: Forgotten

1 Samuel 25

I'm gonna be honest: I almost didn't include Abigail in this series. When I was making the list of women I wanted to talk about, I kept thinking Abigail wasn't going to make the cut. But the Holy Spirit kept putting Abigail on my mind, so finally I decided to keep her on the list. And I am so glad that I did, because my study of this woman of God revealed so much more to me than I ever expected to find! I've really come to appreciate Abigail, and I hope you will too. 💛

First let's set the scene. It's around 1015 BC, during the stretch of years when Saul is king of Israel. Saul is insanely jealous of David because David has been anointed as the rightful king of Israel; naturally Saul doesn't want to accept that, so he keeps trying to kill David. David is currently on the run from the king with a band of men, basically backpacking across Israel, which sounds fun except sometimes food, water, and shelter were difficult to come by.

The story begins when David sends messengers to ask his old pal Nabal to spare some food. Nabal is super wealthy; he owns a ton of land and livestock. In the past at some point, David and his men had provided protection for Nabal's flocks free of charge, preserving Nabal's estate from plundering without even asking for payment. Now, David figures he could cash in this favor for some food.

At the time David asked for food, it was sheep-shearing season, and David knew Nabal would be sparing no expense to supply his shearers with food, meaning there was plenty to spare for David and his men. Considering how David had provided protection for Nabal's estate in the past, surely Nabal would agree to spare some food, right?

However, Nabal was a very selfish man; the Bible describes him as "surly," which means bad-tempered or unfriendly. When David's messengers relayed David's request, Nabal literally said "Who is this David?" Can you believe that?! Nabal knew very well who David was, but he just didn't want to share his wealth! The nerve!

Naturally, David didn't like that very much. In fact, he was doggone furious!! He took four hundred of his men and started marching over to Nabal's place, ready to kill every male who lived on the estate!

Now, this is where our girl Abigail comes in. Abigail was Nabal's wife; the Bible describes her as intelligent, beautiful, and having great understanding. That is to say, this lady knows her own mind, and she can think for herself! Just think, with a husband like Nabal (who preferred partying over dealing with the business of his estate), much of the responsibility would fall to Abigail. And make no mistake: Nabal's estate was frickin' massive. He's got land, sheep, goats, donkeys, servants, and enough food and water to comfortably feed nearly one thousand people!!! And that's only what we can know from the Bible passage!

We don't know how long Abigail had been married to Nabal, but suffice it to say she was very well-versed in the art of managing a business. Abigail had learned to be a leader. It must've been miserable being married to a brat like Nabal, but Abigail didn't wallow in self-pity. Instead she took the bull by the horns, making the most of the opportunities right where she was.

When Abigail got word of the rude way Nabal had turned away David's messengers, she knew bad things were gonna happen if she didn't do something soon. The Bible says "Abigail acted quickly"; she knew what God needed her to do to prevent this disaster, and she didn't hesitate in carrying out God's will. She took the lead--no submissive, subservient woman stereotypes here, no sir!

Another thing to note: Abigail could've just let Nabal take this loss. Across the land David was famous as a noble man of God, so Abigail had no reason to believe that David and his men would treat her with anything but respect. She could've just let Nabal get what was coming to him. (If I'm being completely honest here, I probably would've just sat back with my popcorn to watch the show. 😂😭)

But no. Abigail chose to do everything in her power to remedy the situation. First she gathers up a ton of food: five hundred loaves of bread, two skins of wine, five dressed sheep, sixty pounds of roasted grain, one hundred raisin cakes, and two hundred fig cakes. Then she takes the provisions and some servants and sets out to meet David on the road. And she didn't tell Nabal nada.

Again, notice Abigail took the initiative to go out and meet David. She could've waited at the estate until David arrived (for surely she knew he was coming to get revenge on Nabal), but instead she took the first step to fix the broken relationship. Y'all, there is no shame in saying "sorry" first. I myself struggle with this a lot . . . even when I know I'm in the wrong, my pride gets in the way of amending my mistakes. But Abigail didn't choose pride. She chose humility, and in the end she was able to gain so much more than she would've if she'd remained aloof.

Also take note that Abigail didn't send servants to deliver the message and the food. No, she packed everything up and made the journey herself. She wanted to make amends face-to-face. Take it from me, guys: if you've messed up, don't short-change your apology just to preserve your own pride. Take the L, admit you're wrong, and move on.

David had just finished ranting to his men about how mad he was when Abigail and her caravan came into view. Abigail chose to ride a donkey, which is another symbol of humility. In this way I feel like a subtle reference is made to Jesus's future ride on the back of a donkey, when the people were shouting "Hosanna!" and laying palm branches in His path. Both Abigail and Jesus humbled themselves in order to rectify a relationship that otherwise would've been doomed.

Okay, here is when the story starts getting even wilder. As soon as Abigail catches sight of David, she gets off her donkey and bows down in front of David with her face to the ground, to even further demonstrate her humility and remorse.

Keep in mind that Abigail probably came from a family of substance, and being married to Nabal, she probably wanted for nothing. She was most likely very well-dressed and put together, clean and proper; David, on the other hand, had been living like a vagabond for the past several months. Yes, he was the anointed king of Israel, but he definitely had been living rough for a while. Maybe he wasn't too clean and wasn't wearing the nicest clothes, and he probably didn't smell too great if we're being real here. But despite all this, Abigail prostrated herself before him to communicate her contrition.

Even after all of this--gathering the food, making the journey herself, and throwing herself at his feet, Abigail then launches into this hugely eloquent speech. I don't even have words accurate enough to encapsulate the level of grace and dignity contained in this speech, so I'll just let you read it for yourself:

Pardon your servant, my lord, and let me speak to you; hear what your servant has to say. Please pay no attention, my lord, to that wicked man Nabal. He is just like his name--his name means Fool, and folly goes with him. And as for me, your servant, I did not see the men my lord sent. And now, my lord, as surely as the LORD your God lives and as you live, since the LORD has kept you from avenging yourself with your own hands, may your enemies and all who are intent on harming my lord be like Nabal. And let this gift, which your servant has brought to my lord, be given to the men who follow you. 1 Samuel 25:24-27

Wow. Just wow. Such eloquence, such grace, even as she bows at his feet. Even when admitting she is wrong. God, if I can be half as gracious as Abigail, I'd count myself a lucky woman. And even in the middle of this sticky situation, she points back to God! She doesn't take credit for preventing this disaster; no, she gives all the credit to God. WOW.

I almost wanna cry. Thinking about how petty I've acted in the past (especially when I was in middle school 👀), making mistakes and refusing to admit I'm wrong . . . I could've saved myself so much grief if I just followed Abigail's lead. At least now I'm more familiar with her story, and I can start applying her example to my life.

You know, in just what little is known of Abigail, she really seems to embody the Proverbs 31 woman. If you're a girl and you've grown up in the Christian community, chances are you've heard of the Proverbs 31 woman at one time or another. Generous, hard-working, dedicated, humble. Takes initiative, is strong and dignified. Has peace with God and with the people around her. At times it seems like it's impossible to be all of those things, but if anyone in the Bible comes close, I vote Abigail.

Her speech had the desired effect. Instantly David's anger faded away, and he realized that Abigail was right; it's not his job to get revenge. Thank goodness he actually took the time to listen to Abigail; I know when I'm angry, I'm stubborn to a fault. I won't listen to anyone--and that's another bad habit of mine I've identified through this study. 😂 There's always something new to learn from the Bible, folks!

David accepted Abigail's peace offering, and the two parties parted ways on friendly terms. When Abigail got back home to the estate, Nabal was in the middle of hosting a party with his friends. The alcohol was flowing, and Nabal was drunk, so Abigail wisely chose not to tell him about the crisis that had been averted that afternoon until the following morning.

When Nabal found out what had gone down, the Bible says his heart became "like a stone." This could mean several things; maybe he was just shocked at the amount of food that had been sent to appease David, or maybe he fell into a depression. We don't really know, but whatever happened, ten days later Nabal died.

I'm sure Nabal's death would've come as some sort of relief to Abigail, but I doubt she would have been legally permitted to remain as the head of the estate. However, when David got word of Nabal's death, ya boy immediately sent a letter to Abigail proposing marriage. She accepted, and they were wed; whatever happened to Nabal's estate, at least Abigail didn't have to worry about trying to make it on her own in a man's world.

After all that Abigail had to put up with being married to Nabal, I'm glad she got her happy ending. The Bible says that when Abigail got news of David's marriage proposal, she "quickly got on a donkey" and went to join him. Twice in this passage Abigail is described as reacting "quickly," but I feel it necessary to point out that God doesn't always need us to go quickly. Sometimes He needs us to wait on His timing, just as Abigail waited however long in that marriage to Nabal before she finally got a happy ending.

And listen--you may be wondering why God let Abigail stay so long in that horrible marriage to Nabal if she was so miserable, but look at it this way: if Abigail had never been in that relationship with Nabal, she never would have learned those leadership skills, and never developed a skill in dealing with testing relationships and hotheaded individuals. Because of her relationship with Nabal, she was prepared when the time came to rectify the situation with David. And because of her actions, she ended up being a part of the royal family of Israel!

So you see, no matter how miserable a situation may be, God can (and will) always work it out for good. Just like it says in Romans 8:28!

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose. (Romans 8:28 NIV)

And with that, we wrap up the final part of my "Strong Women of the Bible" series. I can't believe it's already over! I'm almost sad. 😭 But at least now I can go back through and reread all the posts if I want to! And there's much more where that came from! Now that it's summertime, I'll have a lot more time to dedicate to my blog posts. 😁 I'm super excited to share it with you all!

I'm so grateful I got to discover more about Abigail! Though sometimes her story is forgotten, that does not make it any less relevant or poignant. I hope that regardless of how much you knew previously, maybe you learned something new from Abigail's story. I learned that it pays to put aside your pride and humble yourself when necessary; in the end it can turn out better for everyone if you do. I'm so glad I got to raise awareness about this underappreciated Bible character. She definitely had a lot to share with me, and I hope with you too. 💕

Until next time,
much love and God bless!
H ✨💗

*Resources used for this blog post include The Bible Reader's Companion by Lawrence O. Richards, Young's Literal Translation by Robert Young, Matthew Henry's Unabridged Commentary on the Bible, and the New International and King James Versions of the Bible. Great insight, would definitely recommend checking them out!